No Off Season...for dads

It was a violently cold night.   I parked about a block away in Adams Morgan and briskly walked to Bourbon, a restaurant/ bar that specializes in (you guessed it), bourbons.  I was enjoying a birthday celebration with some incredible men that I've known for years.  All of us were fathers, some of young kids and some who are clearly in their twenties.  Since I arrived there last, I had to sit next to the door. People walked in and out, neglectfully leaving the door open.  Ummm, did they not realize that it was -216 degrees?!? I digress.  We talked about different things, such as football, whiskeys, and of coarse, our kids. It was inevitable.  As I mentioned, some of these fathers were already empty-nesters.  As the conversation continued, one of the men said something that completely stuck with me. Photo by Life Yomi "You have to parent for departure.", he said.  Profound.  I don't remember anything else from the night.  It w...

I have two sons, 16 and 12.   They truly keep my life moving.   As I have told many people (as well as those who personally know us), my house stays live, never a dull moment.   I can boldly say that since I have been married and with children, I have yet to be bored in over 18 years !   God knows how to make life to the fullest! Well, that brings me to this point.  A part of having an ever-exciting time in my home is due to talks.  You know…talks.  Yes, there are the talks about the birds and the bees.  But who are we really fooling, birds and the bees are really about sex!  Just say it…sex!  What I know of sex is often times completely different from what my boys know.  And it can be shocking about how much they know and how much they don’t know. Okay, we move on. Then there are other real talks.  Talks about life, chores, responsibility, girls, friendships, money, family, school, and the list goes on and on.  I...

So he finally turned 16. A monumental age no doubt. There are so many lessons to be learned during this pivotal year, especially as we prep him for college. One of the first lessons that we need to teach is how to handle money. If you're reading this and you were in college, you can remember the hundreds of Visa & American Express offers you received before you made it to your dorm room. And don't forget the many banks luring you in trying to give you free checking.  So here's a sure fire way I believe you can prepare your child on how to handle money: by you handling it well yourself. This is also known as modeling. There was a PSA commercial in the late 80's or early 90's where a boy was smoking. The dad walks in and asks the boy where he learned to do that. The boy responded, "From you dad. I learned it by watching you."  I'm amazed at how much our children mimic the things we do.  So give them something positive to mimic.  I could write so much...

It was almost this time last year I wrote about how my boys would rather go outside, or play on the Wii, or sweep instead of reading a book.  Please, don't get me wrong.  They are highly intelligent kids who do very well in school.  They just believe (as probably do many other kids) that the summer is a time to chill.  Well, the books are back.  Due to higher grade levels, their books are becoming more complex in ideals, focusing on the author's purpose, allegories, and a whole bunch of other facets of literature that I don't need to get into now. Each day, I've challenged my boys to read.  They have to...and they don't want to.  It can be a challenge in the house. Well, I had this challenge yet again today.  My son had to read aloud to me.  He read in the most dismal voice imaginable, inducing thoughts of wanting to consume raw red onions and chase them with garlic cloves and prune juice. Then, brilliance came to mind. 'Dijon, why n...

Determination is a very powerful mind tool. It drives a person to do more than he even expects to do. Although the outcome may be positive or negative, the success is in knowing there was an attempt. Let's take my son for example. Everything about him is personally motivated. He's on a motor that is consistently turning, brewing up new ideas and concepts.  And he wants to see ALL of them happen.  He wanted to start his own business. Guess what he did? Start his own business.  He constantly asked me to allow him to cook breakfast and dinner.   Guess what he does now (sometimes)?  He cooks for not just himself, but sometimes the entire family.  Today, he wanted to go to the beach, even though it rained and rained and rained. Yet, you would never guess what he had the opportunity to do.  Yes he did. My son at the beach enjoying the waves that I should have been enjoying. Not everyone is like this. In fact, there are more people who have to be enc...